How's this for a title?

The bird thing didn't turn out so well. I went outside and they all flew off, leaving me standing there with some birdseed and a few crackers. I was out of cheese, so I ate the crackers and some of the birdseed. It was then that I began to think about my own mortality and how one day I will die. You all know you've thought about it too. You'll be laying awake in bed one night having just watched CNN or an Adam Sandler movie and you wonder how people can go on about their lives the way they do in a world where there are such things as poverty, starvation, and Happy Gilmore. Then you think of something funny, blow off your previous thoughts of sadness, and disregard this depression until a later time. It usually comes back when you accidentally engage in conversation with a hipster, or your daughter wants you to rent Bedtime Stories for the weekend. Well, I do believe I have found the solution for these feelings of futility. Go outside. Take up a hobby. Learn how to play frisbee golf. Anything to keep you away from the television. I don't have cable in my house, so that's not so much of an issue for me, but I do have a rock solid internet connection, which in some cases is worse. Just try and become active in anything. If you are already, good for you. Pass this advice on to any friends who you may notice who are less than cheerful. To help get your imagination going, I've uncluded a picture of Snoopy.